its been kinda rough, the last couple days. my emotions are up and running and unforunatly for those around me, i dont hide how i am feeling very well. i am so tired of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. i am so sick of being the sidekick.
i had it in my head that whoever i had feelings for would also like me back. boy was i wrong. its never been like that for me, only once in my life did it work out that way, and look how that relationship ended.
someone told me that i am aiming too high. maybe i am. last time i checked i was actually a good person. i dont say dirty things, i dont watch dirty movies. when something is going on that i dont like, i speak up about it. last time i checked, that was actually a mature thing to do, but i could be wrong.
im not immature (about most things) i deserve a good man who loves me and treats me right. is that asking too much?
im hurt, i feel even worse than i did before. i dont think i aim too high because i deserve the best, why not aim for it. i know i need to work on things, but that doesnt mean i cant like someone and expect them to return those feelings. why cant it just work out the way i want it to. i am so sick of feeling not good enough. i used to have a great self esteem, but its fading.
i just want to love and be loved in return...